Leaping Over the Continental Divide
by the goldenheart alchemist
Summary: After a phone call from Francis, Arthur decides to put a horrible curse on him. Meanwhile, Alfred is flying to London to confess his love for Arthur! Full summary inside. WARNINGS!: genderbent characters cussing, hetero smutt yaoi smutt pregnancy!
1. Chapter 1: The Cause of all the Madness

**Summary: After a phone call from Francis, Arthur decides to put a horrible curse on him! Meanwhile, Alfred is flying to London to confess his love for Arthur! In the middle of Arthur's incantation, Alfred bursts into the room, causing him to ruin the spell. The spell backfires on Artie and now he's furious with him. Will this ruin Alfred's chances of being with Arthur? Or will it increase them?**

* * *

Chapter 1: The Cause of all the Madness

A certain Englishman woke up to the sounds of rain pounding on his bedroom window. Arthur stayed in his bed for a while to hear the relaxing sounds of the rain. Since it usually rained in his beloved country, he was used to the idea of staying inside and reading while drinking a nice cup of tea or watching Doctor Who on the 'telly'. He got out of his warm bed and, quickly, put his robe on. He walked to his bathroom and turned on the shower. Once he adjusted it perfectly, he looked at his reflection in the mirror. His spiky, bright blond hair was messier than usual and he had bags under his pure, emerald-green eyes.

'That's what I get for giving myself a good wanking,' he thought as he entered his shower. Once the warm water hit his body, he remembered his fantasy from last night. Him and Alfred were making love together. Yes, the Alfred F. Jones. The personification of the United States of America. His former colony. His ally and best friend. He was slightly disgusted with himself for thinking of Alfred like that because he took care of him and was, basically, a father to him. He thought about Alfred's eyes and how they, almost, matched the sky in their color. How his hair was the color of golden grain. How perfectly sculpted his body was. How every time he smiled at Arthur, he felt his heart skip a beat.

Arthur realized he had been washing his hair for the past 10 minutes. He finished his shower and got out. He toweled himself off, before he put his robe on. He walked back to his room and put on a pair of brown slacks. He put on his white button down shirt with matching green sweater vest. Once he was done trying to fix his hair, he walked out of his room and went to the table.

"Good Morning, Master Kirkland," said one of the maids.

"Good Morning, Linda. How are you this morning?" Arthur smiled. Linda was a plump, old woman. She always managed to get everything done right and on time. She had always been his favorite.

She giggled. "Just wonderful, Master Kirkland. What would you like for breakfast? The usual?"

He thought for a moment. "No, today I think, I'll just have cup of tea."

She looked at him worried. "Yes, sir. Are you feeling ill?"

He smiled at her, warmly. "No, Linda, I'm fine. I'm just not hungry."

"All right, sir. I'll have your tea in a few minutes," she said as she hurried out of the room. Arthur's mind began to wonder, again, to the american. He wondered what Alfred's eyes would look like, once they were filled with lust. He blushed at the image that had popped in his head. In Arthur's mind, Alfred had put his back on the table and began attacking his neck. He imagined him whispering things like, "You belong to me Arthur, no one else" and "I'll leave marks all over your body, just to make sure you get the message." Slowly, Alfred's hand was slipping into his pants, about to grab his-

_RING RING...RING RING_. Arthur raised a larger than normal eyebrow, out of confusion. "Who the hell could be calling me?" Arthur said to himself as he walked to the phone.

"Hello?"

_"Bonjour,__ Mon Cheri!"_ said a thick french accent over the phone.

Arthur's semi-hard erection had now gone soft at the sound of the Frenchman's voice. "What do you want, you bloody frog?"

_"Ohonhonhonhon~! I was just checking on my petit__ Anglais,"_ Francis responded, casually.

"Don't you have anyone else to bother? Antonio? Feliciano? Gilbert? Anyone that isn't me?" he said, anxiously.

_"What's wrong, Angleterre? Were you thinking of a certain country? Maybe one that thinks he's 'The Hero'?"_ Arthur felt his face heat up.

"Wh-What are you t-t-talking about, you wanking pervert?"

The 'Frog' chuckled. _"Ohonhonhonhon~ you know exactly what I am talking about. Were you touching yourself, while thinking of Amérique pounding your cute, little ass with his-"_

"Shut up, you twit! I wasn't thinking of Alfred! Or anyone, for that matter!" The blush on the Brit was getting worse by the moment.

The Frenchman began the to laugh uncontrollably. Before Francis could say anything else, Arthur hung up the phone and went to his basement. "I'll teach that french nancy to mess with me! I wonder..." The room was quite dusty, having not used it for quite some time. The basement was his spell room. He had all his spell books, potions, ingredients, and cursed charms in there. He pulled out a certain book and began to flip through the pages until he found the right one. His lips curled into a mischievous smirk.

"Yes," he chuckled, "This one is perfect."

* * *

The sounds of traffic coming through an open window, woke up Alfred. He lied in his bed, trying to remember his dream. All he could remember was that it was about him and Arthur Kirkland. Finally, he gave up and looked for his glasses. After rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, put them on, and looked at his watch.

'5:00? What the fuck? How did that happen?' he thought to himself. He sat up and looked at his crotch. His member was fully erected and leaking with pre-cum. He blushed as the memories of his dream came to mind. At first, he thought about just jerking off and getting it over with, but something made him stop. He wasn't sure what it was, but he didn't want to touch himself at all. He went to the bathroom and jumped into the shower. When he finished, he put on a pair of black boxers with a pair of denim jeans. He put on a plain white t-shirt and put on a jean jacket. The jacket consisted of his favorite bands, from AC/DC to Incubus and Perfect Circle to Korn. He stepped out of his condo into the amazingly, busy streets of Los Angeles. The warm, smoggy air made him forget all of his worries, such as that he had to go back to Washington D.C. in just a few days.

He stepped on to the sidewalk and began walking. He wasn't sure where he was going, but he did know that all he wanted was to think. As he walked, he thought about the handsome Brit. How his pure green eyes can pierce your heart and soul. How his rare, bright smile could brighten even the worse of Alfred's days. He thought about how Arthur didn't smile as much as he did when Alfred was a colony. Alfred would do anything to see Arthur smile like he did when he was little, but he wasn't sure if Arthur would allow him. He wasn't even sure if he could make Arthur smile. He missed the way things used to be, but he knew things couldn't go back that way. There were too many problems now a days. Too many possible wars and too many fights in the conference room that the public would never know about.

The truth of the matter is, no matter how hard you try to make peace, somewhere else you've started a war. The only way to be allies with everyone is to be a neutral country and never get into wars between major countries. If a country invades your territory, you have a choice of either letting them pass or beating the shit out of them. In short, you must become Switzerland.

He reached his favorite restaurant. A waiter took him to a tiny table for one, than ran off to get Alfred's coffee. While waiting for his coffee, he continued his thoughts about his beloved. Alfred has loved Arthur since before the Revolutionary War. In fact, one of the major reasons he demanded his independence was that he didn't want Arthur to see him as a little brother, anymore. It hurt him so much to say such horrible things to him. The sight of Arthur on his knees, crying in the rain, almost killed him. And now, after all these years, he still hasn't confessed his love! He needed help. He needed advise. He needed someone who has experience with confessing their love. He needed Matthew, his brother. He pulled out his phone and texted him.

_Alfred: Yo, Mattie! Need ya, bro!_

_Matthew: Wat's up?_

_Alfred: Where u at?_

_Matthew: In Cali, im on vacation. wat's upp?_

_Alfred: SWEET! meet me at my place! i'll explain then!_

_Matthew: O_o uh okay?_

After Alfred finished his coffee, he went to the front and paid his bill. He ran outside of the restaurant and looked around, as if to see if Arthur was around. Once he remembered that he was in England and no business being in the U.S.A., Alfred ran to his condo, even though he was only a little more than a block away.

"A HERO IS NEVER LATE FOR HIS GUESTS!"

He got to his home in under 20 minutes. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. It was a text from Mattie.

_Matthew: Which house am i goin to?_

Alfred realized he forgot to tell Mattie he was in L.A. and felt his face heat up slightly.

_Alfred: L.a. bro! get here pronto!1 ASAP!_

_Matthew: im comin im comin! omfg jst wait!_

Alfred chuckled. He loved keeping his brother in the dark about certain things. Such as, his love for Arthur. He didn't even tell his brother that he was bisexual till just a few years ago. He told Arthur before he told Mattie. That was when Alfred found out that Arthur was openly gay and that he had always been gay, except during his pirate days. He smiled to himself as he remembered 'Iggy' blushing like crazy once came out to him. He thought it was so cute, how he began stuttering kept calling him a 'wanker' and all those other funny British insults. Alfred sighed and walked to his couch.

"And now, I wait."


	2. Chapter 2: The Plan and the Advice

Chapter 2: The Plan and the Advice

Arthur had the perfect plan to ruin Francis' life. First, he made sure all of his ingredients were fresh. Next, he got out the correct spell book and drew the right circles for it. Then, he picked which day to curse the 'bloody frog'. He told his maids and butlers what day they were not allowed to be in or anywhere near the basement, but didn't tell them why.

"Oh, that frog is in for it this time!" he would yell from time to time. As he sipped his Earl Gray tea, he thought about how perfect his plan was. His plan consisted of him using his black magic to turn the Frenchman into a hideous, fat, old, wrinkly woman. He would, then, make France beg on his/her knees to change him back into a man, until he/she was in tears. Then, Arthur would turn Francis into a hideous, old, fat, wrinkly man. He would make him cry and beg until Arthur thought he learned his lesson.

"My, my," he said aloud, "I didn't realize how lengthy this plan was going to be. Oh, well." He continued to sip his tea and think about his beloved Alfred. He's the loved the loud, obnoxious git ever since he could remember. It wasn't until after the Revolutionary War, did he realize that he loved Alfred more than just a brother. At first, he was sick with himself and went through years of denial, but then eventually came to terms with it. He liked knowing that no matter what mood Arthur was in, Alfred's smile could just make him feel instantly better for either a minute or the whole day. Even when the fat arse was being a git, he managed to make every situation seem easy to overcome.

He began to wonder what his little Alfred was doing at this very moment. He looked at his grandfather clock that he stole from Francis in his pirate days. It read one-thirty in the afternoon.

"Its six-thirty in the morning over there. He's probably asleep. I bet anything, he stayed up the night before and played all those video games Kiku gave him." Arthur frowned. What if Alfred didn't love him back? What if he didn't like men at all? He shook his head.

"What am I thinking? Alfred told me, himself, he was bisexual!" He got up from the stool he had been sitting on and left his basement. He went to his study, sat down, and began to look over his paperwork. Every once in a while, his thoughts would drift back to the American. These thoughts would vary from happy and painful memories to erotic thoughts and fantasies or just simply thinking about his beautiful face. He soon realized he wouldn't be getting any work done today and left his study.

He went to his library and looked for a book to sit down and read. As he walked through the many shelves of books, one, in particular, caught his eye. It was quite a thick book and he couldn't remember where or who he had gotten it from. He took the book and opened the cover. It was a gift from the frog that he had gotten years ago. There was a note on in the corner of the cover. The writing was so feminine looking, you would've thought it was from a woman. The note read:

_Dearest Arthur,_

_Here is a copy of my novel that I wrote after our pirate days. I found it while going through my attic in my lovely home in Paris! You remember my house, don't you? Of course, you do! Well, I went through it and thought, 'I bet mon ami Arthur would like this!' knowing the Erotic Ambassador you are. Just make sure, when you are reading it, that are alone._

_ A__vec Tout Mon Amou,_

_Francis_

_P.S. Let me know if you ever want to reenact any scenes! (wink, wink)!_

Arthur raised an eyebrow. He turned to the first chapter, sat down, and began to read. Slowly, his eyes widened at the realization of what kind of book Francis had written.

"Oh, my God..."

* * *

Alfred was pacing in his living room. "Where is that Canadian? Doesn't he realize the Hero needs his sidekick? Damn it Matthew!" he yelled. He heard a knock on his front door. He ran as fast as he could, flung open the door, and hugged his brother. Matthew hugged back his American brother.

Mattie and Alfred look a lot alike, so they were often confused for one another. Mattie's hair was darker and a bit longer than Alfred's and his eyes had a violet hue to them. He was as built as his brother, but he never showed it off like Alfred did. The Canadian, also, had a long curly strand of hair of hair that hung around his face, unlike Alfred's, which was short, straight and was at the top of his head.

"What's wrong, eh? Why did you want to come to your place?" he asked in his weak, Canadian accented voice.

Alfred sighed. "Matt, I think you should sit down for this." They walked to the dark, red couch in the middle of his peanut butter colored living room.

"Mattie, you know I'm bi, right?" a small blush appeared on his sun-kissed cheeks.

"Yeah, go on," said Mattie.

Alfred looked at his feet. "Well, I...I'm in love with someone. Someone we know very well. Someone we've known since we were just colonies. Someone who-"

"I already know you're in love with Arthur, Al," he said in a bored tone.

Alfred's got as big as saucers. "H-...How?"

Matthew raised an eyebrow. "Uh, well, you aren't very good at hiding your feelings, Alfred." For a moment there was a moment there was silence, followed by laughter. Once they stopped, Alfred asked Mattie what he did.

"Well," the polar-bear loving boy said, "When I told Gilbert my feelings, we were already dating, but I made a candlelit dinner outside on the back porch, so we could look up at the stars. It was, truly, amazing."

"Oh, yeah! I remember! You were freaking the fuck out about every single detail and you told me not to call you for a week!" Alfred said, smiling. Mattie blushed, remembering the events of that night. He shook the images away and smiled back at his brother.

"So, how do you think I should tell Iggy?" he asked, still unsure of if he should so it at all.

For a while, Mattie sat there in deep thought. 'How should Alfred tell Arthur?' He thought to himself.

After only ten minutes, Alfred sighed and said, "IT'S HOPELESS! I'LL BE ALONE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE! Francis probably already proposed to Artie and they just pretend to have all those fights when really when they're alone they say things like 'Oh Arthur, I will always love you! Je t'aime!' Or whatever 'I love you' in french is and then my Artie says something like 'Oh Francis! Jolly good show in the meeting today! Maybe I can wank you off tonight?' Oh, God, Mattie I don't have a chance against that french guy!"

Mattie suppressed a giggle and rubbed Alfred's knee. Most people would get a weird vibe if their sibling did that, but then again, Alfred and Matthew weren't like most people. The small gesture relaxed the American. Sure, his mind was still racing but at least he had some kind of comfort.

"I assure you, Al, that Papa hasn't proposed to Arthur. If he did, he would've told me. Besides, Papa and Arthur aren't very good at acting," Mattie said, smiling.

"You promise?" Alfred asked, childishly.

"I promise."

Alfred glared at his brother and held out his pinkie finger. "Pinkie promise."

Matthew rolled his eyes and latched his pinkie with his brother's. "Pinkie promise."

They talked for a while, catching up on everything that happened recently. Mattie offered to make to make waffles and pancakes with bacon. Alfred's stomach answered the question quite loudly, causing Mattie to giggle and Alfred to blush slightly. The Canadian walked into the kitchen and began grabbing everything he needed, from butter all the way to the waffle iron. Not only was Mattie remembering his recipe, but he was also thinking of ways for his brother to confess his love to Arthur. As he was beating the clumps out of the batter, it dawned on him.

"Why don't you just fly over to London and tell him in person, eh?"

Alfred thought about it for a moment. "How about I just send him a card or something?"

"You're telling him, 'I love you,' not 'get well soon!'"

Alfred frowned. "And what would I do if he doesn't love me back?"

"You spend the rest of your vacation in London!" Mattie replied, sarcastically. He knew the feeling was mutual between Arthur and Alfred, but he knew it would be best if Alfred found out on his own. One of the advantages of being invisible is being able to memorize everyone's body language and understanding it.

The American sighed. "Well, I haven't been to England in quite a while. I guess it would be nice to visit. But how am I going to get tick-" He stopped mid-sentence as Matthew waved a ticket to London in his face. Alfred gave Matthew his giant smile and hugged him.

"YOU'RE THE BEST, MATTIE!"

He smiled. "I know."


End file.
